The Stress of Christmas

Christmas is a time of great stress for us.  We don't intend for it to be that way, but it just turns out to be a time filled with unexpected expenses, travel (including figuring out sleeping arrangements), time management, parties, gifts, gifts, gifts.

I've been thinking about how to make Christmas time less stressful this time around, and I think I may have come up with a plan.

This year we are going to limit our gift giving to immediate family, AND the gift has to be something under $10.  I think that's a pretty good start.

Of course, when we go to see family, we'll need to have gifts (of course), so we are in the process of making a whole bunch of jarred cookie mixes.  I'm sure it won't be the usual gift that they expect each year, but it's the thought that counts, right?  Besides Christmas is about focusing on the greatest Gift of all, the gift of Jesus.

A Special Thanksgiving

This year I'm pulling out all the stops for today's Thanksgiving dinner.  I've prepared the turkey and stuffing, the homemade cranberry sauce, green bean casserole, dinner rolls, pumpkin pie, and Lew's favorite punch!

I love to serve my husband and children by preparing nutritious food that makes them happy.

What a glorious Thanksgiving!

Oh, yeah, and what a wonderful Thanksgiving night it will be for Lew! (*wink, wink*)

I Blew It!

I really blew it.  I'm sure by now you're thinking I am this wonderful, submissive wife who would never, ever go against her husband.

Wrong.

Finances are somewhat tight for us right now, and I understand that. However, there is always a little part of me that wants to have prettier and prettier things around the house.  Nothing extravagant mind you, but a nicer table cloth here, a prettier set of curtains there, you know, little things.

Lew finds the materialism unnecessary, and I can certainly understand his viewpoint, but sometimes I see a new lamp and I get a feeling in the pit of my stomach, and I just GOTTA HAVE IT!  Know what I mean?

Well, we were antiquing last weekend, and I found a desk that I just HAD to have.  It was much more expensive than our budget could handle and Lew told me so, but I wouldn't let up.  Anyway, there were some other people from our church at the antique shop, and I just happened to mention the much-too-expensive desk to them. 

Long story short, they sort of shamed him into buying me my prize. 

Trouble is that it really was much too expensive, so we had to make a lot of adjustments over the following week to make up the difference.

One adjustment we had to make was Lew's birthday dinner.  You see, every year, we treat each other to a very nice dinner out to celebrate our birthdays.  Lew likes a little bistro in the next town.  It's pricey, but the food is extraordinary.  Anyway, when I asked him where he would like to have his birthday dinner, he told me he would like to stay home this year and have my homemade lasagna.  When I pressed him about why he wanted to forgo our tradition, he kissed me  and told me that, this year he would rather have my lasagna than any other meal on earth.

Well, his birthday came and I was preparing my famous lasagna.  Then it hit me.  Of course!  The desk!  He decided to have dinner at home this year because we couldn't afford his birthday dinner ... because I embarrassed and shamed him into buying me that stupid desk. 

Lew, being the loving husband, showed me grace by making sacrifices so that I could have something I wanted.  He did so freely without complaint.  I blew it and I knew it.

The desk will be on Ebay tomorrow.

Why I Submit

Okay, ladies, here's the deal.  I choose to submit to my husband.  Yes, you heard that right.  I choose to submit to my husband. 

Have I lost my mind?  Hardly.  My reasons for submission are simple.  I am a daughter of the Most High God, and He has given me His Holy Word in the written form of the Bible.  If I want to obey my Heavenly Father, then I must obey His Word. 

"Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing." (Ephesians 5:24)


There it is.  Simple.  No ifs, ands, or buts.  Just as the church is to be subject (submissive) to Christ, wives are to be subject (submissive) to their husbands in everything.  Everything. Period.

If I want to be a true follower of Christ, then I must obey His instructions.  And this is an instruction without any wiggle room. 

So I submit.

And you know something?  I am very happy to do so. My life is so much less complicated now that I have let go of everything and chosen to submit to my Heavenly Father, and to my wonderful husband. 

No, I haven't lost control of my senses, but rather, I've lost control of something that I should never have had control over in the first place.  It's difficult to explain.  But I know that when I keep my strongholds of control, my marriage suffers.  When I live to serve and please my husband (and as a result, my God in whatever way he needs/wants me, I have undeniable peace. 

I urge you to let go and submit.  Just say yes to your husband and to a peaceful, happy life.

Fall Into Intimacy

Fall is in the air ... I always feel romantic at this time of year.  With the brisk, autumn air, the blazing color of the leaves, the cool breezes ...

It makes me want to cuddle up with my wonderful groom and give him the pleasure he deserves.

I hope all the wives out there are feeling the same way!

Porn? No Thank You!

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.(Hebrews 13:4)

Do you or your husband view (or read) pornography?  If so, you are opening the door to trouble into your marriage by inviting a third person into bed with you.

The marriage bed is a holy place that is meant for the pleasure of two people.  No holds barred.  But when you bring pornography into the marriage, you destroy something sacred that God meant to be shared only by two.

If you are addicted to porn, whether it be pictures, videos, or books (yes, ladies, I'm talking about those "romance" novels), there is help for you.

The Pink Cross Foundation was established to help people overcome their addictions to pornography.  Check them out!

Sex and Intimacy

One of the things I have learned is that husbands are sexual.  Not only that, but they need certain attention paid to them that we don't always understand. 

I believe that is why wives are told in Ephesians 5:24 to submit to their husbands in everything. 

EVERYTHING??  Ewwwww!!!!

When my husband is feeling aroused and feisty (I just love that word), I am bound by my covenant to help him through that feeling.

I have also learned that sex and intimacy are not the same thing.  At least not to my husband.  He wants to feel close to me.  He wants too know me all kids of ways, and he wants me to know him.  All kinds of ways. 

Sometimes he just needs me to lay next to him.  Sometimes he wants to explore me.  Sometimes he wants to get right down to business.  Sometimes I have to understand that sex to him isn't about coitus.  It's about the two of us exploring and getting to know each other more intimately, with all five senses.

Something to think about when you get into bed tonight...

I love my husband!

I just want to give a shout out to my husband, Lew!  He has been so supportive of me my new endeavor to help wives become all their husbands need them to be.  I hope you all get to the place where you can pursue your passions and have the full support of a loving husband!

Now if you'll excuse me, I think I'll go do something special for him to show my gratitude.

My Turning Point

When my first husband died suddenly, I was disoriented for a very long time.  I needed answers to those questions that seemingly had no clear answers.  I looked to my doctor and his antidepressants, and also to books for relief from my pain.

It wasn't until I picked up a book that was on my husband's desk that I finally found the help I was seeking.  The book was "His Needs, Her Needs" by Willard F. Harley, Jr.  The book was one of several that he tried to get me to read with him.

As I read the pages I began to realize the amazing stuff God had in mind for us as a married couple.  Things that I was too stubborn to see.  Things that I was too selfish to do.  If I had been open enough to explore with David, he would have had a happy life, and so would I.

I urge all the wives out there to get this book and read it with your husbands.  But more than that, I beg you to take that knowledge and put it into practice in your own marriages.  You will gain a deeper intimacy

Welcome to my blog!

I'm new to this so please bear with me.  My greatest hope for this blog is that marriages will be blessed by what God has done in my life and my marriage.  I hope to place on these pages my struggles, defeats, and victories as a wife.  I think it's only fair to warn you that I will be brutally honest with my opinions in the area of wifely submission and what I've learned and what I believe to be true.

So, please come and join me on my journey as a weaker vessel who chooses to submit.